So here’s a thing nobody told me until way too late:
Sometimes, your brain just straight-up lies to you.
Like—not little white lies. Big ones. Cruel ones.
The kind of lies that make you second-guess everything you do.
“You’re not good enough.” “Nobody cares.” “Why even try?”
Sounds familiar? Yeah, same.
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That one week everything went downhill
Okay so—story time real quick.
There was this week (a couple years ago?) where literally everything went wrong. I bombed this college presentation so bad I actually considered faking a stomach flu to avoid class the next day. Spoiler: I went. Regretted it.
On top of that, I’d just gotten ghosted (again lol), got like one like on a post I put way too much effort into, and missed a deadline on a writing gig I was really hoping would lead somewhere.
And in all that mess, my brain didn’t say “Hey, you’re just having a rough week.”
Nope.
It said: “This is why no one takes you seriously.”
Thanks, brain. Very helpful.
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But like… why does it do that?
Here’s the thing. Your brain isn’t actually trying to be mean. It thinks it’s protecting you. (Dumb, I know.)
It’s like—your brain’s still running this outdated survival program from, like, caveman days. It’s scanning for threats all the time. And when it finds one (like embarrassment, or rejection, or failure), it’s like:
“Oh no. Big scary risk. Better shut this down before we get hurt.”
So instead of hyping you up, your brain hits you with
“You suck. Don’t bother.”
Because not trying feels safer than trying and failing.
But the thing is, not trying also keeps you stuck.
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Okay but how do I shut it up?
Look. I haven’t “mastered” this or anything. Still a work in progress. But here’s what’s helped me not completely spiral when my brain goes full drama mode:
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1. Give the voice a dumb name
I call mine “Kevin.” No shade to actual Kevins. It just… fits.
Whenever that voice pops up like “You’re gonna mess this up”, I just go—
“Alright Kevin, take a seat.”
Suddenly it’s not me saying it. It’s Kevin. And Kevin’s kind of a loser. Why would I listen to him?
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2. Write down the lies. Out loud. On paper.
This one sounds weird but whatever, it works.
Next time your brain throws trash like “I’m such a failure”, write it. Just like that. Then write what’s actually true.
Like:
“I’m such a failure.”
→ “Okay I missed a deadline. That sucks. But I’ve gotten stuff done before and I’ll get back on track.”
You’re not lying to yourself with fake positivity. You’re just… recalibrating.
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3. Seriously—ask for receipts
Your brain’s out here making wild claims like it’s got proof. Ask it.
“Everyone thinks I’m annoying.”
Really? Everyone? Did they say that? Do you have a spreadsheet? No?
It’s like catching a friend in a lie. Call it out.
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It’s okay to feel like crap sometimes
Not every day’s gonna be motivational poster vibes. Some days are just… meh. Some weeks are a straight-up emotional dumpster fire.
I still have days where Kevin’s yelling and I believe him for a bit. That’s human.
But now I notice. I pause. I question.
And sometimes, that’s enough.
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Final ranty thought before I log off
If you take nothing else from this mess of a post, take this:
That voice in your head? It’s not always telling the truth.
And you? You get to not listen. You get to talk back.
You’re allowed to fail, be messy, take up space, try again.
And honestly? That makes you braver than you think.
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If you read this far, idk—go drink some water or take a walk or something. You deserve better than Kevin.
Catch you next meltdown.